But Remnants

12 12 2014

I fell in love and hard.
In a way even I could not begin to fathom.
With depth that defies fathoms.
But something happened and it shattered my being..  and changed everything, tipped the balance and spilled some ounces of love out.

Despite all that and then some, I still love you in ways still indescribable and still immeasurable.

Can you just imagine how much that love when it first started really was? Bet you can’t.

But you chose to test and disrespect that love. And it hurts no one else but me and you. Me because I’m only human. And you because deep within you, you know no one can love you as much.





Falling…

29 11 2014

They say if you can’t be alone, you’re not supposed to be in a relationship because you’ll just confuse wanting to be with someone with fixing loneliness.  See, I like being alone.  And the past few weeks have reminded me how much I love being alone.  But I long for you.

I have done everything I could to amuse myself and I have been amused.  But when I laugh out loud, I think of you.

When I am working and listening to Iggy Azalea, all of a sudden, my playlist gets shuffled and I hear Falling.

I wish you wouldn’t be so goddamn stubborn and just come back to me.

But then again, I can’t really force someone who is no longer interested to come back.  Love isn’t enough, darling.

So I guess some songs will have to be removed from the playlist and I just need to get busier.





9

10 11 2014

years

took

that

long

for

me

to realize….

 

while

not

perfect

oh hell, definitely not.

 

no one

yep

no one

has ever

made

me

feel

the -est of things

 

and with

just

one

touch

you made me

 

 

 

 

 

remember

 

 

 

 

 

see you in another lifetime.
 

 

 

 

 

another 9.

years.

 





Video Scandals

2 08 2014

I can understand being brazen and daring—and maybe adventurous when it comes to sexual encounters. But to be so reckless that after some time it pops out of nowhere? That’s called being uber-irresponsible.





And Then Some

23 10 2013

It all boils down to loving freely and embracing everything that comes with it.  
It’s all about meeting halfway.

It’s all about giving your all without expecting anything in return.

But I do expect something and every now and then, the pain of knowing you are not deemed deserving of such gets unbearable. 

Some wants are too powerful they become real needs.





#12 Spells Bull’s Eye

11 10 2013

Reposting this from Marc and Angel Hack Life.  

It’s easy to make your relationships more complicated than they are.  Here are twelve simple reminders to help you keep them on course.

  1. All successful relationships require some work. – They don’t just happen, or maintain themselves.  They exist and thrive when the parties involved take the risk of sharing what it is that’s going on in their minds and hearts.  Open communication and honesty is the key. 
  2. Most of the time you get what you put in. – If you want love, give love.  If you want friends, be friendly.  If you’d like to feel understood, try being more understanding.  It’s a simple practice that works.
  3. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot in someone’s life. – Never force someone to make a space in their life for you, because if they know your worth, they will create one for you.
  4. There is a purpose for everyone you meet. – Some people will test you, some will use you, and some will teach you; but most importantly some will bring out the best in you.  Learn to see and accept the differences between these people, and carry on accordingly.
  5. We all change, and that’s okay. – Our needs change with time.  When someone says, “You’ve changed,” it’s not always a bad thing.  Sometimes itjust means you stopped living your life their way.  Don’t apologize for it.  Instead, be open and sincere, explain how you feel, and keep doing what you know in your heart is right.
  6. You are in full control of your own happiness. – If your relationship with yourself isn’t working, don’t expect your other relationships to be any different.  Nobody else in this world can make you happy.  It’s something you have to do on your own.  And you have to create your own happiness first before you can share it with someone else.  If you feel that it’s your partner’s fault, think again, and look within yourself to find out what piece is missing.  Your partner can never ‘complete’ you because you are already whole.  The longing for completion that you feel inside comes from being out of touch with who you are. 
  7. Forgiving others helps YOU. – Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.”  It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.”  Forgiveness is the answer.  It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life.
  8. You can’t change people; they can only change themselves. – Instead of trying to change others, give them your support and lead by example.  If there’s a specific behavior someone you love has that you’re hoping disappears over time, it probably won’t.  If you really need them to change something, be honest and put all the cards on the table so this person knows what you need them to do.
  9. Heated arguments are a waste of time. – The less time you spend arguing with the people who hurt you, the more time you’ll have to love the people who love you.  And if you happen to find yourself arguing with someone you love, don’t let your anger get the best of you.  Give yourself some time to calm down and then gently discuss the situation.  
  10. You are better off without some people. – When you have to start compromising yourself and your morals for the people around you, it’s probably time to change the people around you. If someone continuously mistreats you or pushes you in the wrong direction, have enough respect for yourself to walk away from them. It may hurt for a little while, but it’ll be ok. You’ll be ok, and far better off in the long run.
  11. Small gestures of kindness go a long way. – Honor your important relationships in some way every chance you get.  Every day you have the opportunity to make your relationship sweeter and deeper by making small gestures to show your appreciation and affection.  Remember, making one person smile can change the world.  Maybe not the whole world, but their world.  Your kindness and gratitude matters.
  12. Even the best relationships don’t last forever. – People don’t live forever.  Appreciate what you have, who loves you and who cares for you.  You’ll never know how much they mean to you until the day they are no longer beside you.  And remember, just because something doesn’t last forever, doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth your while.




175

6 10 2013

Today marks the 175th day since I last held your hand.  Not a day passes when I do not count the ticking of the clock.  But I have made progress.  It’s been over 2 weeks since I last gazed at your Facebook profile picture.  There’s hope for me after all.  

In time, even when my heart protests, I will get over you.  I will. 

But tonight, I remember what seems like just yesterday.  And my heart sheds torrents.